In November 2024 I took my kids on a family heritage trip. We followed my father’s route from Kristallnacht in Germany to the border crossing in the Netherlands, and the various places he’d stayed, and we visited an ancestral hometown where my fourth great-grandmother is buried. This was the first trip for my younger son and my older son’s partner. While it was Josh and my fourth trip, it was vastly unlike the previous three in so many ways.
In this series of posts over the coming month, I will share some of the more amazing experiences we had. I’ve posted some of this on Facebook, but wanted to include it in my blog since not everyone is on social media. I start writing on Day 2.
Nov 8, 2024
I had to take off my necklace this morning.
It’s the necklace that I bought in October 2023, from an Israeli jewelry maker via Etsy. I love my “Am Yisrael Chai” (people of Israel live) necklace. I’ve never taken it off for more than an hour since I first clasped it around my neck. From time to time, I find my fingers involuntarily tracing its silver letters, probably when I’m most anxious about the future of the Jewish people.
This morning, I woke up to horrific news. Israelis and Jews were targeted and violently beaten after an Israeli-Dutch soccer game in Amsterdam. This event was called a “Jew Hunt” by the perpetrators. It was pre-meditated and well coordinated (which I didn’t understand until a few days later).
This morning, I woke up in my hotel room in Amsterdam. I was looking forward to our planned morning: We were to meet our German friend, Monika, at 9:45 in front of the National Holocaust Museum. We would visit the Museum together and pay our respects at the many Holocaust memorials outside, foregoing a more touristy walk around the downtown.
This morning, I had to make a series of decisions I could never—NEVER—imagine having to make. Never. We would not visit the Museum, would not even meet Monika in front of it. It might not be safe, we were warned by a Jewish friend in the city. I called Monika to give her a new meeting location. She hadn’t heard the news yet.
This morning, before heading downstairs for breakfast, I paused to consider what I was wearing. I had carefully selected my jewelry to reflect the purpose of my trip. My longer necklace with a large Magen David (Jewish Star) and Hebrew writing on it, could easily be hidden under my shirt. I specifically discussed this strategy with Seth before I left home for the airport. Anytime I felt uncomfortable, I could put the sign of my Jewish identify in hiding.
This morning, I tucked my Magen David necklace under my shirt.
Then I noted that my Am Yisrael Chai necklace could not go into hiding. It wasn’t the right length. Before my trip, I had reasoned that if someone didn’t read Hebrew, I was safe wearing it. Now, I reasoned, if the wrong person knew the necklace contained Hebrew letters, I could be stabbed. Or beaten. Or thrown into the canal. This was a heart-wrenching decision.
This morning, I unclasped my Am Yisrael Chai necklace and hid it away in my suitcase. I take it back out of hiding, and return it to its rightful place around my neck, in the evening.
Tomorrow morning, we will head to my father’s hometown of Bocholt for a Kristallnacht commemoration ceremony. I anticipate the relief I expect to feel as I drive across the border into Germany. Here’s that sentence again: I will feel relief driving into Germany. And I will feel that relief on the anniversary of the violent 1938 event that drove my father and his family out of Germany and ultimately into hiding.
Today, the actors are different, the places are altered. The targets are the same. The goal is the same. Will the rest of the world step up this time? Will enough citizens of the world know that they must stand up and speak out? Now.
Like so many of you, I am horrified. I am frightened. I am angry.
And I am strong. And I am resilient. And I am determined.
Tomorrow, I will carry feelings of horror and anger.
Tomorrow and the next day and the day after that, I will do my best to continue urging others to demonstrate their own courage, compassion, and kindness. We can all bring our own light into this world.
Photo: Am Yisrael Chai necklace I wear 24 x 7. Except for the one day.
